Working... the pros and cons

Cons:
1) You lost the convenience of taking afternoon nap on your bed... now, you can only do it in the toilet...

2) you cant stay up late and chit chat with friends...


Pros:
1) You are useful to people.

2) You learn to be more useful.

3) You are used.

Be happy.... happily tired..

Feeling USED!

Happy! I know there seems to be a negative connotation to the above topic. But here I am, always like to present another side of things/terms to myself...

This is the first day back at work, after 5.5 weeks of uselessness... I was feeling really excited. Just like I told Zhiying, it felt like going back to school after school holidays in Sec sch/college. I was filled with this eagerness.... so much so that I woke up at 530am instead of the scheduled 7am. Nevermind, time to do some chatting, with frens, then with God....

Mind is a powerful thing, some pple may feel so down, so sianz (Chinese dialect for bored), dread... or even unwilling.... to do the one thing that pple are paying us to do... work! Haha...

I thank God that he gave me the ability to see the positive side of things... the ability to appreciate the torch light in darkness... some pple see the doughnut, some pple see the hole. I am happily feeling used... finally I can polish my audit skills, my excel skill... and of coz interact with colleagues, claim some mileage (not that I want to drive 35 miles to work)....

While I "basket" in this joy of going back on job... (it sounds really funny).... I do appreciate that this intangible thing call "joy" is so fragile. This moment, you have it... the next moment... you may lose it... It may make many pple feel insecure... worried... even start to feel unhappy... But thank God, I know that I wont have to go through this sense of insecurity... Becoz I know I can always call on Jesus... I can always feel secured in Him... I know that IF I CHOOSE to believe that He can make me happy, I will not be unhappy.

I am really proud of being happy. Not proud of the state of mind, but proud of the ability to engage my mind to be in this state. Not proud in the "I look down on you" sense... but proud in the "Thank God I have God" sense... complicated hor...?

God is here to give us to ability.... do you want it? Yes....? you sure....? Wanting it is not merely the use of the mouth... say "I want"... it's also the use of the mind... think "I want"... and the use of the heart... feel "I want"... and Most importantly... Ask for the "I want"... Ask from God... ask with your mouth, with your mind... and with your heart... Seems easy... yet seems so tough... it's only a matter of if you really "want"... or not?

Murphy's Law

There are 3 Murphy's laws that I learnt, (I thought there are only 3, but when I googled it, I realised there are alot), but one that I really remembered was illustrated to me like this:

For all the days that you bring out your umbrella, it wont rain. On that only day that you dont, it pours!

Why am I talking about this? Since this is a journal for myself, it must have related to me...

Up till today, I have been through 5.5weeks of unassigned time (some say it's worse than 5.5weeks of peak)... So, for 4.5 weeks, I guai guai (chinese for obediently) stayed in the office or at home(to study for my CPA *YAWN*).

Then at the end of the 4.5 weeks, an intelligent friend asked me and ZY:"Since both of you are unassigned, why dont you take off to somewhere out of town?"

I thought:"Good idea! (my trademark phrase) Why dont we drive to San Antonio, which is merely a 2.5 hrs ride away? Since they didnt need me for 4.5 weeks, despite the fact that I begged to be assigned, they surely wont need me for another week, let alone, just 1.5 days of me being away. (1.5 days divided by 28 days(4.5 weeks) is a mere 5%!!! Immaterial, leave)"

So we headed out on the Monday afternoon, since Monday is usually the most probable day that we will be called to start engagements. No news by 1pm, so off we go....

The trip was pretty amazing in itself. We spent some really quality couple time along the river walk of San Antonio till abt 11pm... MUST GO!... then went back to watched TV till about God knows when... (planned to wake up at 9am to have the free breakfast)

*Cue* Next morning

*look at the watch* WAH! 10:55am!! We must check out at 11am, or we will be have to pay late check out penalty! I immediately went to bathe and wash up. After which, I woke ZY up to ensure that she suffers the same surprise.... haha.. And in good speed, I managed to have my shower, and "reported" to the check out counter at 11:03am!

We werent made to pay extras, thank God!

Being more and more like Thinmothy (this crazy guy who will go out and play until 12 midnight the day before he goes back to work), we decided to go for the Spurs Basketball game that night(usually ends at 10 to 11pm) before heading home. So we drove to the SBC Center (now known as the AT & T Center) to buy the tickets for that night's game. Being the Kiam Gana that we are, we chose the cheapest tickets, at $10.

Right after the purchase of the tickets, we received a prompting... (Thank God!) "maybe we should check our voice mail to find out if there are any messages for us"

So we went back to SA downtown, hoping to find a free car park slot, like the day before, we didnt eventually. However, when we were in the process of doing that, a kind friend of ours called us to inform us of the only news that we feared.... WE HAVE BEEN BOOKED FROM TUESDAY AFTERNOON! If it's one day earlier, we would have been able to attend to that... if it had been one day later... we will be back already... why must it be it!! I laughed to myself... murphy's law!

Anyway, I wasnt bitter, I felt rather guilty actually... we should have been there to answer the call.... But we couldnt go back in time, so we had to proceed with our original plan.... which is to continue with our trip in SA, and the basketball game later.

The game was at 730pm, it ended at 10pm. By the time we hit the main highway back (I10), it was almost 11pm. Since it takes 2.5 hrs to get back, the ETA time would be 1:30am!!

We were armed with a large cup of coke, for the supply of caffine. Thank God! I managed to survived the whole journey without feeling the least bit sleepy. We got back on time, and went to bed quickly.

The final twist to the story.... we got to the office at 825am the next day, hoping to impress the manager.... haha... But... she didnt get in till afternoon, and duely released us from the 2-day engagement as they have "already met their urgent need yesterday".

Sadz... unused again... but Thank God that nothing major happened..... and I had my fair share of fun.

Moral of the story: I must learn to be vigilant at all times in the aspect as a Christian. Jesus may return anytime. As it was told in Mark 13:35"Therefore keep watch, becoz you do not know when the owner of the house will come back...... 36 If he comes back suddenly, do not let him find out sleeping. 37 What I said to you, I say to everyone:'WATCH!'"

So... as a Christians.... I wanna warn myself to be watchful... I pray that God will prompt me, like He did this time, to be wachful.... to prepare for the 2nd coming of Jesus... to always read his word diligently...

The trip to the Strawberry Farm

Last Saturday, Apr 1, 2006, we finally made our trip to the strawberry farm. It was quite a fun activity.

Despite that fact the we HO-LANDed (Amry term for getting lost), we manage to get to the farm in good time, and had a fruitful(pun intended) trip there.

It is certainly worth the 1 hr plus drive up to this farm called King's Orchard, which is about 60 miles (abt 100km) away.

I am not sure about others, it was certainly a fun time for me... not only to pick the strawberries and eat them, but to take some photos and learn from the photography experience.

Here it is.... the link to the photos... this time it will be a little more more interesting as I manage to put a few captions in the pictures...

http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2107589956&code=21504633&mode=invite&DCMP=isc-email-AlbumInvite

Bible thought of the day

Mark 11

v22 Jesus:"Have faith in God. 23 I tell you the truth, if anyone says to this mountain,'Go, throw yourself into the sea,' and does not doubt in his heart but believes that what he says will happen, it will be done for him.

v24 Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. 25 And when you stand praying, if you hold against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins."

My focus was on having faith... but when i was reading my study bible, i saw this:

"God will answer your prayers, but not as a result of your positive mental attitude. Other conditions must be met:

1) You must be a believer;
2) You must not hold a grudge against another person;
3) You must not pray with selfish motives;
4) You request must be for the good of God's kingdom.

To pray effectively, you need faith in God, not faith in the object of your request"

The last sentence hit me the hardest... I always pray to God focusing on the item.. e.g. my job. When I went for my first interview when i was still in Uni, I asked God for that job. I was not focusing my prayers on God... I was focusing on "that job".

I pray that God will teach me to focus properly... teach me that to pray to Him on things... not pray on things to Him..... I pray that I can, to the best of my ability, do things according to his will, His will be done, not mine... Thank you Lord for this revelation... Amen!

Bible thought of the day

Mark 10

v21 Jesus:"One thing you lack. Go, sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasures in heaven. Then come, follow me."

v23 "How hard it is for the rich to enter the Kingdom of God!"

v25 "It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God."

There are some thoughts from my study bible which enlightened me today as I read the passage. I always thought it meant that if you see hang on dearly to money, you will find it hard to enter the kingdom of God..... which in essence is not wrong, but there's a better way to explain this.

In Exodus 20:3, God commanded us:"You shall have no other gods before me."

The passage in Mark is actually addressing this. If I place making money to be of great importance, as something I worship, something which I sometimes put above my quiet time.... we are actually making it our other "god" unknowingly.

I question myself... do I hold on to money dearly, do I treat it as my own resources or treat it as God's... It's hard, especially since I am accountingly inclined, for me to KNOW that I am merely safeguarding God's resources, I do not own them (Just like HDB flats, we dont own them).

Two things I sincerely pray.... 1) God help me place you way above money and treat money as my other "god".... help me diminish the importance of money in my life.... 2) God help me realise that I am merely safeguarding the money on your behalf, help me not think that I own them and equate them to power. Help me not do things against your commands to gain extra money.... Help me Lord...

I feel so much better now that the burden has been remove. Thank you God... Amen!

The books of my life

I took a picture of the books that are dominating my life (literally). Like some of the less academically inclined people... I dread reading.. books are usually better than any other medicine if I cant get to sleep... To me... insomnia and books never go together... I never really got down to reading ever since I was young.... I hate it..

Only until when I was in Uni that I realise the true value of books... The knowledge that it contains, and how much it widens your horizon in terms of life's perspective, if only u are willing to take time to read it... It is such a wonderful creation of God...

One book that I am trying to find time to read is "Photoshop CS2 for digital photographers" by Scott Kelby, highly recommended by my fellow photography enthusiast, Wei ren.

This book teaches me on little tricks that I can use to improve a picture... A picture says a thousand words... this book wont improve the number of words, but it certainly can improve the "vocabulary" used.

It is certainly my wish that I can truely master the little tricks and thereafter be able to help people around me create amazing picture... for free! I am sure many will be greatly blessed by it.

This is a book that relates to my hobby... I dont spend much time on it now... but i hope to find time..

The second book of my life now is one of the four books that I have to read for my CPA exam here. You may ask... when is your CPA exam? Eh.... actually... it has not been determined yet... I am reading it since it is really thick... and would probably kill me when I finish it....

On a more serious note, getting the CPA is one thing I hope to achieve while I am here. I am not sure the commercial value of it (shd be high), but it's certainly something which I think is worth working for.

I genuinely wish that I can gain the necessary knowledge through this book and its other three "siblings". As a matter of career needs, I am reading it diligently... at least starting from yesterday (Tuesday).

The third book of my life... and definitely the most important book... is the book of life.... The Bible.. ("life application study bible" in this case)

Bible is a ridiculously amazing book... Each time you read it... you get new revelations.. and from the numerous sessions I had with Ben... we realised how differently each person interprets many of the things written in there....

This is a book that I want to read religiously (pun not intended).... As a Christian, I do know the importance of reading the bible everyday... It's like the daily food we take in... it helps to fuel our spiritual life... but the evil one has been successful in making me read it less frequently than I hope to...

I pray that God help me... I want to get fresh revelations each time I read the book, I want to read it each day... faithfully... I want this book to be the book of my life... I want to be like many of my friends, and have Christ as the person I live for... I want to feed my spiritual life... I want to be a true Christian... God help me..

In my life... there are always many things that appears more urgent.... other matters that requires my immediate attention... but I know reading the bible and interactions with God is more important than any other matters/things in my life... I pray that God help me prioritise... and help me realise the urgency of the matter... the need to read the bible... the need to read it NOW...

hmm... having said that... I better go read the bible now... period.

Winning the battle, but losing the War

Here I am, back after a lengthy absence (in my standard)....

I am just reminded of this phrase that I thought of (must have been inspired by some of the quotes i read), winning the battle, but losing the war...

In our daily lives, like it or not, we are bound to offend someone or get into some kinds of disagreements.... and a discussion aka arguments aka quarrel takes place...

For me, many times I go into a discussion, sometimes more heated than I wished, wanting to present a different perspective, wanting to explain some things better, wanting to change the way the other party sees it.... However, I usually talk in a fashion that suggests otherwise, that makes people think that all I want is to win the argument, be the best debater (sometimes the most long winded one)... In the end, the other party relent, (sometimes out of the hope that I will not torment them with my long winded story or explanation, sometimes just having nothing more to say to me).... NO! I didn't want that! I dont really know how to go on...

At the end of the day... I didnt achieve the objective of "convincing" the other party, I failed in converting their thoughts, presenting a fresh perspective... Despite winning the battle (argument), I lost the war (main objective)

To link it to reality, one time, I heard a friend saying this:"Christianity is like any other religion, it's all about doing good..." Deep down in me... I know it's not true... However, I didnt say anything to that....

To explain that with my limited knowledge... I want to say... Christianity, imho, is not "like any other religion".... It's a relationship with God... it's wanting to live for God (not that I am already... but i will not give up trying).. It's about wanting to do all things (since God is good, so only good things) in order to please Him.... It's hard to put that across to my pre believing friends, but it's true... (Skip this part if u want to be spared of my long winded self) Why do we want to live for God? It's simple... we are sinners and all have fallen short of the standard of God. So God sent his son to save us... that person is Jesus.... and Jesus is not only here to save us, He is here to be our friend. And it's different from other religion as we dont do good things to go to heaven. No matter how many good things u do, you cant! Unless you accept the fact that Christ is the only person who can save you and bring you to God and heaven.

So... to sum it up.... it's not true that Christianity is "like any other religion"... absolutely not.....

How shd I put it across next time when i face that statement again? God help me... but the problem is... I lack the faith that God can help me... it's the heart and head thing... head knows God helps... heart is weak and scare.... Help me win the battle and, more importantly, win the war....